It's not an old-fashioned 4th anymore!

When I was a kid and as long as I was in Oklahoma, we went to my grandmother's farm for a BIG holiday celebration every holiday. I loved holidays- all my cousins were there and lots of family and it was beyond wonderful. My grandma would take all the kids fishing in the creek, we would eat big watermelons from their farm, and make homemade ice cream. My mother continued the tradition and holidays were always important to us. I have done the same thing and for example, can't recall a single 4th of July that Joe did not barbecue and everyone was invited over---kids, grand kids, his mom and her best friends when they were alive- it was a fun day and we always made homemade ice cream too. Thanksgiving my parents always came for the holiday and it was great. Christmas and Birthdays were BIG events and treasured memories.

It sure has changed for me and there is that strong twinge every holiday, because I want it to be like it used to be. But guess those days are "long gone" and it makes me sad. I miss them. I am alone today and so tried to keep busy. Everyone thinks I am so busy, but much of it is because what other choice do I have at the moment? Sit and cry all day? Don't think that would work at all.

So today about 11:00 I went to see Joe at the care home. That was the best thing I could have done (and did not expect it to be), because the wonderful lady who used to be there a couple times a month with her folding keyboard, was present today- playing old time musical hits, and the floor was cleared and it was dancing time! When I got there she had just started and had said to everyone there that she should have called me and told me she would be there, and she sure wished Ruth was there! About 2 minutes after her saying that, I was at the door and walking into the room. Even Joe said, "we were just talking about you!"


The place really livens up when she is there- you can just see the changes in everyone-it makes them so happy! Lenore got the dancing started-she danced with Pat then added Bill (his 2nd day at the home, and what a character!) to her circle of dancing, and then we got Joe into the circle. Then Pat and Sydney danced-they are my favorite together and are so cute and smiling and just fun to watch them enjoying every minute! Natalie is a new resident and she watched it all from her wheelchair.
Fortunately I had my ever-ready camera and took lots of photos! This was a good day for Joe and even though Lenore couln't get him to move his feet much, he still had fun. When I left later, Bill told me he loved my name, and said I was a very nice lady! It is great to have a talkative resident there again.

The not-so-good news today was being told some things about Joe. He is doing pretty good with his new room, but often forgets he has a new room, and goes to the old room. I told them last Sunday to keep an eye on him, as they might find him in bed with the women in his old room! Lenore said he does try to go in there and they stop him. I asked him if he liked the new room and he said he didn't know, it seemed too small. It is smaller but it is in a much better location for him, and he will get used to it. (I hope) Anyway, this is the bad news: Last Monday he went into the living room totally naked, and when Maggie tried to get him to his room and get clothes on him, he got violent and tried to hit her. Not sure how it all got solved but it did. It is not the first time he has gone through the house naked but the last time was some time ago. This time he was very agitated. They are having the hospice nurse come out tomorrow and see about getting him on some medication that will calm him, when he gets like this. He actually got this agressive with me a few weeks ago also. He gets very aggressive and angry if you want him to do something that he does not want to do. To me, there is no worse illness than Alzheimer's. Just robs your mind and your dignity. This is not the real Joe, and we all know that.
Breaks your heart watching him, simply breaks your heart.