Havana Cafe and more........

Today my plan was to be at the group home before 3:00 pm so I could watch/particpate in the activity hour. My friend Nancy Salminen, who I met at Muhammad Ali Center caregiver meetings (when her father attended the Parkinson's class) was doing the class, as she does every Wednesday afternoon. I got to the home about 2:45 and had time alone with Joe before Nancy arrived. Joe was sitting alone in living room, reading today's paper, when I got there and he was glad to see me.

He told me he was "going to cut my ears off" for putting him in this home. But he sort of laughed, and I did too. Joe has always said this to everyone in an endearing way, and especially to my children and their friends when they were growing up. An old man used to say that to him when he was a kid, and he has always used it in a kidding way. So it made me think maybe things were better. Then later he did tell me that for a second he hated me when I put him there, but he did not hate me now. And then at another time this afternoon he said he had been there for a week, and I told him he had been there 5 days. And he replied "it feels like 5 years."
Every so often he would make some remark (sort of negative) about the place. I think he is doing better but he does not love being there, that is for sure. I did tell him I would only have him stay in a place I would have been willing to stay in, and he said, "you can say that because you are not staying here. If you were, you wouldn't like it." Which is probably true. But he did tell me he was sleeping better and had a good sleep last night. And they showered and shaved him today- so he was looking good.

Nancy Salminen had them do bowling. She had a heavier ball (not as heavy as the real thing) and some lightweight large pins she set up for each of them and they had 3 tries to knock them all down. They had fun doing this it seemed to me. Then she put on a Dean Martin CD and they danced! Well, some of them danced. One of the staff, Rosie, danced with Joe, and then with a couple other men. And Pat the only woman there (I think she is 91. She is not sure about her birthday but today told me she thought it was December 19, 1915, although I am not sure this is right), danced with Sydney who cannot talk. They were so cute! I took pictures of all them- bowling and dancing!).

Herman Goldberg, who is my favorite resident, (other than Joe, of course!) has cancer and has been very sick since yesterday. His son came to see him this afternoon, and I talked to him and also talked to Herman. I kissed him and told him I was praying for him, and that I loved him. He said "I love you too". He is the sweetest man and I love talking to him. His mind is sharp but his body is falling apart. Later when the bowling started he got out of bed and into his wheelchair and came and played too. I was happy to see him do that.

You can easily get very attached to these people. Joe is by far the youngest person there. It is an interesting experience and one that makes me want to cheer them, bring them some joy. I have promised to make milkshakes for all of them one day next week. Pat was so excited, she just jumped up and down and clapped her hands. She weighs 82 pounds and is a little fragile doll.

I think this day went very well. It will just take time. I pray Joe learns to like it at the home and find ways to keep busy. He knows I can't get him up if he falls, and that it is full time care for him. At least, I hope and pray he realizes it. My friend Kathy Weiner has said she will bring starter plants over soon and help him start a garden there. One of the activity directors, Maggie, has said she would help him garden, too and walk with him. They have all fallen in love with him.

I had a very nice and intersting lunch today with my friend Kathy Weiner at the Havana Cafe on Bell Rd., near Scottsdale Rd. They spotlight different culture's food and this week was Puerto Rican dishes. I had the most delicious fried sweet potatoes, and empanaditas filled with cabbages and chicken and vegetables. Kathy said she had been wanting to go there for a long time. It was very interesting.
Thank you God for a good day!